Marc Bachrach is, or has been Marc Bachrach is, or has been, a:
Musician and Singer
Wedding and Funeral officiant
Radio Talk Show Host and Producer
House Concert producer
Sunday School teacher
Synagogue Spiritual Leader
Devoted son and grandson
Marc’s Lived in 11 cities on both coasts and the MidWest, from Malibu to Manhattan
And performed in 32 states and 7 countries for audiences from 4 to 4,000.
He has been mistaken for the Grateful Dead’s Jerry Garcia more times than he cares to count.
His topic today:
“Helping People Say Goodbye”: Celebrating Life while in Hospice
by Leonard Felder PhD
A ruff transcript of our conversation:
I’m here with Cantor Marc, Cantor Marc I’m so happy. Well, that makes tools the happiness overflow. You know, we’ve been just so every just in all disclosure as I do. We’ve been trying to put this together for a couple of months and Mark was one of the first people that I talked to about this idea of getting it off the ground and I’m just so glad that we could finally get here.
Well, I’m sure that gratitude and exciting to put a real person his own voice and energy to what was just a couple of text lines on inside Timer app for well. That’s right. We met on inside timer was where we actually where we met the first time and well, you know, I’m just going to jump right into it.
The first question is. Why meditate my goofy answer is why not? I know one of my influences the Center for Spiritual Living is a rubber named Steve Rambo who some of you might be familiar with used to do the weather on Channel 2. Just a wonderful human being and he says, I don’t meditate for me I meditate for you because you’re going to have a problem.
If I don’t meditate I like that answer. Yeah, definitely in one of my purposes is to use it not only as a way of, you know, restoring my balance with all it is and coming into harmony instead of swimming Upstream all the time, but to rehearse a state of mind and a way of being. That ostensibly I want to bring out into the world more and more soon part of meditating is reminding myself.
There is this place to go to that I can drop into it almost effortlessly if I choose to and to remind myself over and over again. Hey, I have this choice we. The Motto if you will again humorously of my mind skill center for hypnotherapy for 35 years now has been lightened up. For tighten up, it’s your choice.
And I mean that’s so sincerely meditation or self-hypnosis or any of the many labels, which is put on to achieving a certain State of Mind and Body relaxation and thoughtfulness or mindfulness all of them present us with the opportunity to develop a skill. The matter what is happening? We can drop back into that place and make better choices come from a deeper place of wisdom and authority and really live life fully instead of again swimming upstream or trying to pretend that what’s happening isn’t there all those wonderful things we.
Learn to do either by default or with direct instructions from our parents family and environment sure that kind of leads into the next question which is what is your definition of mindfulness and how do we live a more mindful life? Yeah, my initial response to mindfulness. I think it originated with Jon Kabat-Zinn or I’m not sure how you pronounce his name or popularized by him.
Was it like been doing this for a long time? And onto the rubrics of stress reduction professionally and of course self-hypnosis and meditation itself and mindfulness kind of cropped up in my initial reaction was an adolescent one because usually be mindful of your p’s and Q’s you’re sure he had to do was just something adolescent Rebellion about my reaction to it.
So I said, well this-this is like, what is the purpose of calling it that when there were other words we. Prior to this and when I got it, it seemed to be a little less tainted with any of the other baggage that other things might have meditation for some would-be Eastern and for some that would be foreign and other and putting off Roberto acid Jolie who is the founder and the creator of psychosynthesis, which I was trained in.
Drew much of his wisdom and inspiration and the
The genesis of some of his ideas from both Raja and Karma Yoga and yet you won’t see in his in his public writings in the two books. He was most famous for psychosynthesis and the act of will. Two different books. There isn’t a mention of either of those things right? Because at the time he was Congress of the fact that that would be off-putting to people in a Western psychological circus.
And in other words, it would give that somebody an opportunity to instantly discount what he was saying that wasn’t his purpose was to prove anything or to show that who this system really sexy or glamorous sure. It was to get real information over to real people and why they could process it, boys.
This is circuitous. Root for saying well, I think mindful. It says we got the time – you know to allow your mind to be full of what’s real and I saw something on inside the timer. I love your thoughts are fake news. Hmm, just like oh there’s a thought. Isn’t necessarily what I mean. The thought is a fact because I’m having the thought it isn’t necessarily the truth.
Right? So mindfulness is being allowed to be completely aware of my environment my inner and outer environment with his little filtering as Little Resistance as little distraction as possible Right to get there and to continue to act in a mindful way. I have to collect certain. The muscles would pertain to relaxing my body inner and outer tensions subtle tensions in my body noticing my responses to different stimuli either internal or external and noticing them that without making the wrong making the bright resisting them trying to decrease them, but just go on that’s.
Like oh, I wonder how long that will last right, you know, I’ve never taught this before to is realizing those feelings inside of you. Is that what you’re referring to as they as they come up or experiences using the suppress them right but not necessarily joining them as a sense of power in other words, you know, sometimes when I would hold on the anger, it was really a way of continuing to try and feel powerful in this situation right rather than.
Doing okay. I had that I’m letting it go up because it’s bad but because it’s done if I hold on to it any longer. I’m doing it out of this subtle kind of hmm. I think I’ll remain powerful might have my anger. I’m really strong and you know Mantra all that crap sure when it was really just the subterfuge for I won’t like to go like a two-year-old kind of tantrum, of course, comfort with I’m angry.
I have every right to be angry so fu. Right. No, actually I was effing me Chuckles and I figured that out I went. Oh, okay. This is something I might want to gradually you’re even more than gradually let it also serving a purpose for me. Yes, sir. I’m getting to know you that’s what Michael was about and getting to know both of us me you ask all of us to know, you know, really allowing myself to get that connection between all of us without you.
Continually refusing to see me as something so separate and so unique there nothing else matters and nothing else and all that stuff. Sure sure, you know, I’m reminded of I’ll take a Segway and hopefully, you’ll assemble his back. It is the coherent one of our prayers want one of the most ancient ones when I say are my tripod Jewish people and.
Folks who made it out of Egypt with crazy anger management Moses, you know, right meditating for 40 days on top of a mountain. Okay, another tangent. I just came back from you where I was performing for the B’nai B’rith Youth Organization a lone star region of BBYO on Friday night. I performed my comedy hypnotist show on Saturday morning.
I led workshops in Jewish meditation right one kid. Said to me. Oh, I go to meditation classes with my Rabbi at the synagogue. He has a little bell from India that he brings we get really relaxed, but I don’t think there’s any such thing as Jewish meditation. Oh, okay. I’m glad I’m you know got some opportunity to share some thoughts about that.
What do you think all these people talking to God that they like have a radio? You know, how do you think they got into that state? Right were Abraham Isaac Jacob Moses 40 days on the mountain, you know comes down with the operating principles of the universe using, you know, just dial it up on the TV as a god.
It’s time to talk, right? Sure. No, this is the this is our operating system. It’s us it’s as if you were giving them an owner’s manual. I’m sorry if you’re given a brain. The nervous system in the body at the beginning and nobody gives you the owner’s manual sure except for some esoteric places while years ago now not so esoteric or people it said, okay.
Have you studied this for a zillion years, you’ll get it. No, it’s actually quite simple but it takes practice, you know, this actually leads into the next question where you’re going with your with the conversation is the next question is actually what is the What is the. This between meditation for completion and prayer.
So let me answer to that by finishing that it’s fine because it’s all working into that same thing and it’s answering my question when I read that I love that because I was so great and it was something I had just address this weekend with another Rabbi and what some kids and sure it was very fresh for me.
Shoot. The colonic blessing cocaine is the high priest. For the Priestly blessing with a rabbinical blessing most people who have ever watched Star Trek familiar with the hand gesture that goes along with that sure. It is the Vulcan salute it is lifelong and prosper those the hands are actually in the form of the Hebrew letter Shin some say standing for shut-eye, which is one of the names of God the idea is that the spaces between the fingers are windows through which the light of God shines when the priest holds them up.
A lot of stuff that goes along with that but Leonard was very Jewish Leonard bad boy, and you know, I was a kid in that youth group. I was talking about. Wow, the Aza is now called BBYO because of the includes the B’nai B’rith girls and the boys, right? That was our high school Jewish fraternity and we’re sitting around watching the tube and well, we almost fell off the chair I bet that’s the fight.
That who no, no he didn’t just do that. Because most of us had seen that and Yom Kippur a model of very most serious. Holy, you know solemn days as sure and it was accompanied by tremendously strange if you were in an orthodox setting almost wailing and gutter all kinds of stuff. I mean it was for a young kid who’s actually very almost scary.
That’s right, but very intense and see if making that the Vulcan salute live long and prosper was at once. Wow, and source of Pride for us and excitement in wow, that’s really creative. And that’s brilliant God. I have never I never knew that that see any you learn something every day. I guess I’ll get you that said that’s a really good one though.
I like that. I will send you a link with Leonard explaining that yeah, I’ll add that to the site and let people that people reference that actually now at the end of my weddings because I’m quite pretty my weddings do weddings on privilege to officiating right because it’s the shorthand side. That sounds way too narcissist.
Plus I’d be a bigamist at this point of all the wedding’s I did I yes in jails and your lady might be a little bit annoyed. Yeah little so at the end you know, I see, you know, we’re about to make this thing you’ve seen this before and yes, it is life long and prospers and I my blessing involves living long and prospering their family or the community.
But if you want to do this, we’re authorized, you know, I’m not even a Cohen but somebody’s got to do it. Shouldn’t it be you their friends and family of course and it’s just and you know when you raise your hands and if they don’t quite separate, right it might be genetics ask the person next to you to help out separate your thing.
And it’s a gas. You know what we’re all doing that and then if it’s an Interfaith wedding then I’m singing the Hebrew words to the tune of amazing. So everybody feels a part of that energy. Okay, I did draws our regulars. We as a people even though we’ve created profound liturgy and liturgical Melodies and stuff.
We’ve also absorbed in the simulator like the Borg I couldn’t resist that everything all the elements of cultures around us right from ladino and Eastern Europe. Everything has entered in so don’t be surprised if. You know, you’re hearing some of our religious music and it turns out to be a German drinking song for me, right Sarah because there’s everything is sacred and everything is usable.
So, right right. So what I was going to get to there’s a lovely book I think will reference that to eight players that can change your life by a friend who’s a psychologist named Leonard Felder and as part of his Psychotherapy practice. He is always looking for tools and methods and take homes.
Couples as individuals that can help them in real times of conflict stress when they really stuck he found that certain prayers ancient prayers had tremendous power if they were interpreted correctly and utilized and so the colonic blessing became one that he began to use himself when he was absolutely stuck in a relationship and a point of conflict and a point of what seemed to be no return where there was no way to.
Consider being compassionate kind to the person because his defenses were up to their defenses job. Like he could not even conceive of them responding in a positive manner any potential move or communication. He would make would be met negated and why bother that kind of really stuck dense thick contracted place, which is obviously taking a toll at least on the person aware of it and probably both of them right and so he began to experiment with this prayer.
Which in its Essence says is asking God to bless the soul of the other person and the life and the path of that of the person. My interpretation is a little bit better. Thanks to a friend. They doing well father Jerry Bellamy who I love officiating Interfaith weddings with a retired Catholic priest.
Hmm my friendly joke about him is you know, how. Become a retired Catholic priest you walk into the diocese one day and say boys congratulate me. I’m getting married next weekend. They go, father. That’s fantastic the caller, please. Yeah, right one of the most authentic purveyors of love and joy and celebration and sacredness I’ve ever had the pleasure to meet just always up levels my own game and inspires me and he’d go Neo in each service.
We’ve done said, folks, God is not like a light switch. You don’t like to pray to him and turn them on. Turn them off or know God’s always doing this. It’s us that’s in the wife. And in the same way in Jewish. We understand that our prayers are to get us out of the way. He’s so we could we can experience what’s always on not like a prayer is not the light switch that then turns God honor in every God’s got a grant this know, right?
That’s the force. The blessing is always there. It’s in the Bible. It’s here. I’m putting before you life and death blessing and curse. Listen, you’ve got both but you know, I’m actually cheering for you to choose life to choose blessing. I’m doing every I’m giving you all I got but it’s your choice like that course and that’s you know, the voice that sometimes can get Amplified.
So with the colonic blessing, he would silently. Actually, an experience him for not so silently experiencing himself making that blessing deliberately on that person that he was in conflict and things would begin to shift things would internally shift within him to where options would come up on a new tone of voice.
Perhaps a new melody in his voice. It’s not as we know just the words we speak. It’s that repetitive Melody and that instantly turns the other person off the moment they heard. I then started practicing it silently after I’d read about that with the conflict with my daughter one time. We were standing on my driveway, which you just have to climb up because it’s like the launching pad for Cape Canaveral.
It’s the Steep incline and you know, we’re about to go round and round and I just silently started praying that and sing, you know connecting to my parent feelings about her and then. Connecting to that blessing of God protecting her God turning his God’s countenance towards her and. and bring her peace really really feeling that as the core that I wanted to experience and man if.
My mouth didn’t change and suddenly her mouth change. I never mentioned it until much later, huh? I’m sure I’ve experimented with that and has been very potent and all of which I’m sorry. I just that made me think of there’s an in the boot in the Buddhist tradition. There’s a loving-kindness meditation.
That is that same thing, you know about wanting to but you know want to have them full filled with. And kindness one-time thing to be happy wanting them to be prosperous wanting them to be healthy you all being. Yeah, people. Yeah, beings people. Yeah. I mean, it’s said that when you said that it just reminded me it brought that up and that’s a magnificent Global one where you write broadcasting meta to the whole world, right?
This is actually more specific. This is honing in on one soul. And of course, changing your relationship to that Soul by. That show which you is an inner teaching that I think Leonard really discovered but primarily was looked at as an outward manifestation and outward doing and this was really more on the being level sure using it as an opportunity to get the static out of the way and get down to.
To the core, which is we’re all one. We are all connected. We’re all blessed. Right? How come we you know move into complete harmony with each other including having our legitimate complex. Our disagreements are paying all that stuff and then moving through it rather than you know refusing to let go of it.
Mmm, so. Again, that that pretty now circling around to what’s meditation what’s contemplation? What’s prayer in my tribes’ tradition that very very close. I mean the rabbi who I was talking with this weekend. So, you know, most of our meditative tradition comes directly out of prayer cabalistic meditations come out of prayer.
There’s there’s a few there’s some that would be kind of on a like a mantra level you what. Brother is a format. Right? So you’re saying the same thing repeating the same thing to get yourself into a place then again, of course, you were actually contemplating that on a deeper level of the quarter it is what is it chicken or egg stuff here.
Then we have actual prayers which might be one line or it could be longer than that, which you would use to with what we call the appropriate qivana Hebrew word for intention or you know, what your understanding of the prayer is and what you’re trying to bring to it. And how you’re trying to use it and then the third would be questioned and I guess those would fall into contemplation or but I don’t even that broader sense of grokking, you know, the timeline used to speak of and from that I’m grateful to my Kahuna teacher surge King magnificent.
Kahuna shamans speak seven languages written some fantastic books in the very simple language. But it’s no simple person by any means not to use his knowledge and wisdom steam, but can speak way more simply than I do. God bless him and that part of contemplation. He was very much a part of the rich Jewish meditation tradition.
One of the statements is about a human being a human being Is Not a Human Being unless that person has an hour a day to themselves do contemplation to do to just be in nature this morning. My lady who’s been disabled for quite a while now. I see she got up early somehow and I said, let’s go out and meet the Sun.
Because that’s how we tune into organic time and I just come from Euston where they were putting me up on this beautiful Lake and I googled what time sunrise was because I had no idea and I was out there half an hour early and so was the deer looking at me and I’m looking and I have another wow, and then I want you to know, I got to bring this home.
I got too sure if she’s willing to go and get up which is difficult. Now, we found a Hillside and you know every. Opportunity to just contemplate it and be inorganic time right and a way of bringing, you know, these mindful this practices into further alignment Attunement Harmony and inhabit.
There’s a habit Force to the to the university. It runs on organic time the more I can run on organic time. I allow myself to do that the easier. Calms the more the synchronicities appear at least I’m willing to accept the been noticing without and that’s the trick glamorizing them. Oh look I meditated and now I have a sign hot.
I’ll never forget. I was being trained in Psychosynthesis by yet Doug Russell’s an LCSW, and I absolutely brilliant sweet compassionate deep fella and he took me on a meditation Journey a guided imagery if you will, which is one of the core tools of psychosynthesis. And that we wanted to cave and blah blah blah long story short I emerged as Horus the Sun God and I’m laying on my back and I’m making sounds I never heard come out of my mouth before that.
I bought this is now 40 years ago to something like I am Horace the sun, you know with all the riverbank and I was there was a lot of psychedelic stuff going on and footnote important for no. I’ve never used any psycho. Substances because I rescued a few people off bad trips when I was 18 and thought well I’m way too thinly rap to do this stuff and I just I’ve never been like scared of puking but I’ve never been a fan of it.
So yeah eating these mushrooms that are all over my friends’ floor that he brought back from New Mexico and watching him pee. Not for me not fun. Looks like fun not get you know, that’s the price of your joy, but not my joy. Yeah, I think I’ll learn meditation and self-hypnosis sidestep the P.
Okay. Yeah. It’s like that’s where the hell of a jump off a typo back. It’s okay. We’re still here. There was a point, you know, actually I just want to we also have a blind deaf dog here for this the heavy breathing that you’re hearing here. It’s not my fault either. It occurred to me that he was breathing very heavy when he comes around.
And anyway, it’s a drone. Anyway, I didn’t want to interrupt but go ahead of mindfulness the police. I’d Stompers the hour a day that everybody needs to be a human being. I mean, obviously, that’s a generalization, but the principle is important. But if you just a beast of burden and you just run by all of your responsibilities and stuff like that, I’ve no time to contemplate who you are why you’re here why there aren’t immediate as it may never be an answer just the act of holding contemplating grokking the fact that you even have the right to ask the question sure us to assimilate some of.
That’s an important human function. That’s the spiritual muscle that we all have the opportunity to flex and indeed. My traditions do it do it now to get every day. You sure none of us some of us live up to it. Some people are monks and Hermits and others have you know lives in the 20 sometimes?
I think it’s easier for them to sit in a cave then it is to be a real job, you know, anyway, so part of that tradition would be sitting and just saying, who am I? What’s God were where am I? The god of the voice of the one the force that animates us all, by the way, there’s no was actually no Hebrew word for God in the five books of Moses.
It’s not there. That’s a much later conception. That is not Jewish obvious like 87 different Illusions to what God’s name it, but it isn’t it through. Well anyway, should that that the questioning process? Comes just sitting with where am I going? Am I in Balance, you know are all of those kinds and then deeper questions.
What is what is true to shuva which means turning away from the mistakes? I’m making and toward Harmony One. What for me? What would be Tikkun Olam would he rewards for Restoring Harmony in the world? What is my next step along that path and not expecting an answer just allowing the space for that question to have validity and opportunity to yield fruit?
If you will write and Sue that third part is very integral to any sense of what’s ostensibly now called Jewish meditation. There is the more mystical stuff which involves. Arcane combining of the letters and the 88 names of God and in certain ways and point your finger at the Sun and you know, right as every mystical tradition has some very specific ritualized in the and esoteric may be used to be quite secret meaning only a few people talked about it.
No, those things are becoming much more available, but I would say that’s more for Scholars and people. Are heavily invested in wanting to delve into the mysteries of our particular tradition and how it’s it’s you know continued its search for the wanton and for connection to Consciousness, but for most people, that’s the historical fact and yet even with that.
At this point, I mean my Approach is certainly more of a cafeteria style if I find something in the cafeteria that’s fascinating to me. I really applicable to right now. Yeah, I wouldn’t hesitate to pull off some incredibly esoteric meditation and use it for a month and see what happens sure. Feel what.
Once and it allows you to have your mind open to everything and find the things that you can out of whatever you’re finding day-to-day particularly within my much. I mean, you know, my tradition is tribal. It’s also quote-unquote religious. It’s spiritual. It’s called there’s a lot of stuff there sure and each one of our tribes has a tremendous amount of richness to two grand and I have no trouble appropriating from other ones.
I mean the rabbi. Is your inference my movement called Jewish renewal founded it. He could walk into any church and play the prey the entire mass in Latin and not miss a beat. Not because that was important that he knew it but because he was comfortable doing it. Anybody has to me said, Scott.
What what’s your problem? Sure? Sure. This is just another language as Hebrew, you know when I want to do whatever wedding explain. Especially if it’s Interfaith missile, even a few people have never seen the Jewish wedding oranges. It’s like I don’t want you to feel like you just showed up in a foreign language movie, and there are no subtitles.
So every any Hebrew we’re going to use is going to be explained and it’s not going to be explained by the King James Bible version. It’s going to be a contemporary spiritual thing that you can access right now. And now let’s pray our favorite pair and I know some of you have been praying it perhaps some of you listening to this podcast, please God let.
Not this Ceremony be too long or too boring. Amen. Aren’t you get a lot of buy-in at that point. Yeah, that’s a good one. So your contemplation meditation prayer where were their intersections are they different and for me, they’re going to tell you they’re they’re pretty much Blended up sure suit my morning meditation begins with oddly enough.
Wonderful insight timer meditation called water meditation where we ritualize the first cup of water and and and really create access gratefulness that it’s here and that we’re 60% water and all that stuff and set and use that as setting the tone for being mindful for the rest of the day, right?
Then I go into the central prayer of my tradition, which is the Shema which means here or. Standing Shema Yisrael, Adonai elohenu Adonai. Echad. This is if you get this prayer you basically get the whole trip. Sure. Yeah, the rest is commentary and well within all right, they’re actually oppressed.
They would be more meaningful. If you get this one you really you get the spiritual core sure because so much of our thing is not so he’s not about faith. It’s about. It’s about being here in this world treating yourself and other people with the kind of respect that God treats us to be that like it.
May I then have a reading that revs almond chapter shall emiru. In a book called Gates of the heart that the dear friend gave to me and it explains in a very rich and profound spiritual detail what those words have six words because I thought honestly feel that giving this example from my own practice will more eloquently say what of course I understand what the answer is.
Then I haven’t written out the shorthand yet Susan great question. I might actually write it while I’m talking here. Who knows. There you go. Mm. Oh syrup. Okay, Shema hears understand. Yes real he Israel is the name jape get Jacob is given after struggling with the angel after climbing the ladder and all that stuff.
That’s where the name Israel comes from up until then was in Israel. Yes, Raphael. Is uh name of God life force all it is right. Yes. Raja is Russell literally just rail means god wrestler and what it means on an on a richer level is. Hey, you struggling with whether God exists or not with, are you?
Okay? Are you not okay to have a lot of shit going on in your life that I had you who was confused and distracted Hey listen next odd. My which is the Hebrew words you would hey, these are names of letters you would hey valve. Hey, no consonants there. It’s actually all breath. You can’t pronounce them it’s unpronounceable and yet we assign pronunciations to it.
Actually, the very Orthodox won’t even say it. They’ll say Hashem which is the name. Okay, but you would have off. Hey, yeah wah in breath sounds and even breaths. Oh, I have something art would be how it would sound like. although Nia is. We use those letters and then we say that word but it’s not what it spells.
It doesn’t spell that. It’s just a shorthand for it all the levels of reality. That God is and always is godding. You leave off an eloheynu. Ale again is God. Oh, hey new is ours through our God. Ours are being in God’s being in God’s Essence again. I don’t know this Auto now this you would have of a and by the way, that moment is when I.
Sighs you’d being ahead the hate being the arms and the shoulders the valve being my torso and the hate being my pelvis and hips and legs literally. Man human created in the image of God. It’s a very potent kind of connect. Right sure so that the actual letters come out of that understanding that pictogram.
If you will let original pictogram. There’s a profound esoteric kind of thing. That is very accessible right again, you would have to know, you know, at least the letters to have that have any meaning whatsoever guard least you can look at and go. Oh, well, that’s interesting. I’m curious. So as I’m doing that I’m feeling.
At in my body another way of getting closer to hey, really? No. No. No, I’m not separate. I’m it’s not that I’ve important because I have got know everybody has this but I do lots of cool for sure Elohim. I don’t know and then this you would have evolved hey is was always will be a hard one.
Infinite Lee loving unique presence force of life one. That’s a big concerts a lot of words there. But so I do it very slowly. I might read it out loud as I said or I might just say it out loud and I’ll say it even more slowly way War slowly. I just said it so I can really hear. I really connect to that meaning otherwise, I would just be Paul parroting and ripping through and checking a box.
Okay, I get it to us today. Which doesn’t it? Sometimes I have to do that. I just do time constraint or I ain’t feeling it or whatever. That’s fine. And I’m phoning it in but I know that even phoning it in as part of the process that it is, you know, some days you’re hot and some days they should not and so I get to the end of that now.
I come to what are my intentions and I have another kind of pictogram above the head. I have a ball of light and that’s from Raja yoga, which is the light of the higher self and so all my spiritual intentions commitments agreements and. Knowing that I am going to continue this practice to keep that line of communication open to keep my awareness of could be mindful of my spirits kind.
Of course. I might review some of those which is showing up today and tomorrow to do this meditation, whatever and any other things that occurred to me and how I could act in the world for somebody then to my feet feeling my grounding and my intentions for my ground to take care of my environment my.
Ships by finances and all of that stuff my body but what health things were able to do and finally my arms connected to my heart to an open heart filled with compassion reaching out into the world planting the seeds making the actions touching everybody which is much mindful kindness and compassion as I possibly can and at the end I lay hands on either the next couple.
I’m about to marry or the. A couple I’m going to talk to tonight or somebody I’ve worked with in hypnotherapy or anybody that I’ve served and I imagine that that energy. Tunes us and that in that goes through every one I’ve ever served or touched or you know, been a part of their lives and ceremonial way or a healing way or therapeutic way and that that.
Mass-energy is like one large Attunement and it’s like a psychic business card sending out to people who I am most suited to serve and who most would get a lot of value out of being with me. They’ll know. I’m in the universe right available and it’s through that entire broadcast system that I feel that energy going back and forth and healing all of us.
And to that end, I keep right in front of me in that space pictures of the most recent people. I’ve married or people I’m going to marry so we can kind of focus on the energy of blessing going to them that Attunement of hey, it’s all one the Shema sure and also this kind of yeah, I want to keep that thing open so that bringing my hands back to my heart at that point and the harvesting all of the seeds that we planted before once.
And putting my hands out and now bringing in my family very closely and sharing that blessing. I’m almost done because this really is quite a complex layered thing and then I do five repetitions of the Smallwood breathwork and breathwork. I mean. Sad now Zeb is my Hebrew name. So instead of saying sh’ma Israel.
Listen, Israel. Listen, God Russell know, it’s God saying it to me inside me. Listen Zev. Zephyrs wolf in Hebrew Hebrew neighborhood. Listen, Mark Wilson’s F. And then the rest of it did that it’s all one that they were connected, you know, blah blah blah, then the second time I say it to those people I love and I say it with as much love as.
With the intention that they’re experiencing that message inside them, hmm dvorah and if they have a Hebrew name that I know I will use the Hebrew name rather than they’re there on the main course. The next one is my death and I experienced the moment of my death letting go. Letting the small be the last words that I say and ending on a hot one.
So that has my breath goes out icon. I Just Surrender and melt into the Oneness and show you’ll not only any fear but just simply I’m home at these right? He’s an alternately I might substitute being stuck in the concentration camp gas chamber with a whole bunch of other Jews and it becomes this huge.
Final defines we know are gone. But the thing we’re going out on is hey, I don’t care if somebody did this to me. I am going to be defiant about this bullshit and affirm the truth, right which shows certainly a pressure cooker to coin a phrase. The next one is the end of the universe as we know it that the universe has stopped expanding and God is now.
Taking the universe back into God’s mind. And so it’s all collapsing into a black hole. And so I assume that that’s like a Mikvah which is a body of water which you cleanse yourself and Suits like. Saying this might as an affirmation that as we are all absorbed everything sent you a non-sentient back in the gods monitor that like gone but even that surrender right discussed in the lecture.
Finally. I do all five of them at the same time. If you can even conceptualize that which is the person the loved ones. I love my death and the end of the universe which is called in Hebrew. Yahood in mystical. Our unification a true unification of all the levels of reality or of the things you’re putting together so that all of the paradoxes all of the depth and breadth of that can be experienced in ways.
We can’t talk about. Occasionally, I actually get to that plants and that’s fine. Yeah, you could is also interesting enough at the end of a wedding ceremony. The tradition is to have a hood which is an 18-minute place where the bride and groom go away go into a room. They feed each other. Who knows what else goes on there’s the consummate the marriage somebody’s supposed to stand guard a show mirror and they have that time just to grok what’s going on so that they don’t have to.
Been to Ohio, but you swallow I’m married to you. Wow. Yeah, which I think is just a great beautiful thing so much pop culture – oh, oh man. That’s a great idea. Yeah, I’ll just put the photograph the event planner. We only if I get it to listen, you know what you don’t have to make it 18 minutes you make it three minutes, but aren’t you were three minutes?
All right juice. With each other and going we’re here, you know to breathe just and to breathe just oh my that’s my old if I’m cranky about anything about my industry. It’s that you know, it’s become such an industry that there’s a cookie cutter approach and everything’s on a rigid time schedule and there’s.
Some people don’t think there’s any fluidity in that right, you know that’s changed in 40 years believe the clergy told you what to do the event planner didn’t tell the clergy what to do right sure and balances everything so that question I just think is phenomenally important because the lines do get blurred.
Between contemplation prayer and meditation in very rigid terms of black and white terms they’re easy and a great player is when you’re sitting down with something that you have that is either been written and is ritualistically performed in his a part of sacred writings and that people do communally or separately or individualize prayer, where you are just simply praying from your heart to you, know to the one or God or whatever meditation is.
A formalized process. Will you set aside a time to quiet the mind to focus on any particular Mantra or focal point which will allow you to become more and more still and contemplation would be asking questions and sitting quietly and contemplating or contemplating an object or contemplating a relationship or whatever that those are pretty easy to Define, but I find as you get really into.
Any of those practices? It’s not to Sue Cotton Draught and write and meditation in particular. If I may is not a monolith, the more that you know, you explored the different meditation every religious tradition has meditation practices of meditation is just there so many forms and people, unfortunately, the first if they have no experience with.
They seized on Zen They seized on no thought nothing but Stillness of you know, not too many people are going to achieve that without a lot of work a lot of work and when somebody goes and says well I’m going to try all nothing’s happening what they’re saying is I didn’t get a any mind Zen experience that most people have to pay a lot of dues to get to you know like that right and so screw this I’m not doing that I didn’t happen in 10 seconds.
Forget it. Yeah. One year, one of the first things I bring up when I’m talking to people about meditation is that it’s not a quick fix and that in La especially everybody wants everything like yesterday. And it really this is one thing you can’t get yesterday. You got to put in the to the last question that I.
Yes. Yes, we have one more in the latter was subtracted. I’m still talking and you said it was your be half an hour? Yeah, you know you are generous it is little you know, I want I want to get the I want to understand and it takes What It Takes and I sort of felt that if you made all this effort to come out I needed to give you everything I possibly could exactly appreciate it.
What lessons can or I guess the last question less is always more simple is best all of those are true. The last question is about compassion how because I think in our world as recent events and everything, you know are all of our Collective lives over the last year’s compassion is always I think we need to find it and I wanted to know from I asked everybody how do we promote compassion in ourselves and the world around us?
What can we? Do in our daily life to do that?
For being starting with self-compassion passion towards self. It’s really being willing to separate punishment self-punishment from constructive criticism from awareness from taking responsibility and from. Choosing intending and rehearsing to take a different action next time not to getting hung up even on the power in the seductiveness of self-flagellation.
Hmm, you know because then it kind of the payoff and beating yourself or feeling guilty about something and holding onto that is oh see I’m doing something about it. No, you’re not. You’re using it as another, you know, the ego feeding excuse to go. Oh, I’m it might be playing the victim to yourself or whatever, but it’s not growth.
It’s stagnation. That’s the kind of thing. I struggle with once in a while. I was wrong. I was weeping this weekend. It was a ritual at the Youth Organization on Saturday night. I was staggered by the amount of emotional depth and vulnerability that young men teenage men would reveal in front of each other.
The ritual was called separateness separates each one of the leaders of this group of 300 the regional board. Got up and told their own story about any kind of struggles any kind of separateness involving drugs and alcohol being rejected by the family being betrayed by friends, whatever I was stunned because of Migra’s back.
Then there was no way we had the vocabulary of the willingness to do anything like that in front of each other except talk in are girls and taking a paper bag and some dog. Apogee lighting them on fire in here. There’s the usual teenage crap. That’s funny. I mean the world of great things too. But that was you were going to talk was about that.
It wasn’t certain about how we were wounded Court how you know, we felt less than anything but potent and mozzarella and cry and so I was sitting there listening to this I fuck it was videotaping and I realized what they were doing and I turned off the video right away is this was way too Sacred Space.
And then just flashed on the guy who young man who committed suicide before senior year is a big gentle giant. He’s what we called retarded back. Then we didn’t have words like a challenge to whatever. He could have ripped the bullies apart. He was huge. He could have beat them to death with their arms.
But is it in this childlike capacity couldn’t do that. And so he just endured this just unimaginable pain and berating and stuff. What was particularly? Deep for me in the wound of that was that my mother God Rest her soul at in her mid-40s was the kindergarten counselor for the camp. I was the head of in her nylons in a skirt.
And you know right flat shoes while all the kids are running around in short shorts and stuff and the counselors were 16 and he was her assistant. She made him she made a particular. Project out of bringing him in and he was fantastic with children. He was just miraculous. He had so much understanding and love and compassion.
I mean he was it was a lot back when he was allowed to be who he was without, you know, brutality and Punishment and absolute lack of kindness and then, you know, just one day we found out that he was in his garage and just put them. Put the whole thing, in the end, it ever struck my mother very hard at me and standing there that night I realized man.
What we would have been like if we were guys who could have told these stories. I think we would have instantly said, you know what we need to take Mitchell. We need to make him a member of our club here. We need to make sure he’s protected, you know, we need to stand with them because he is. Being brutalized and we were watching it a witch’s walking past it that’s not compassion.
That’s not even kindness or Justice Cheer. It’s just fucking you know narcissism and you know, we got ours and hey you be responsible for yourself. Now compassion would have been could have been the path we didn’t take and I remember telling this and I recorded that I made a little video for my fraternity brothers and I sent it to him right there and really wept.
Good hard Weep. The rest of the ritual was taking different colored paints one paint one color was for struggles with friendship one with drug and alcohol one with struggles with family Etc taking that color paint and throwing it on the on a big cloth that had blue painters tape in the in the letters of the fraternity Aza and so everybody went through their stuff and through the paint on and then we took them.
It often revealed that boom reveals that the letters that had not been scarred by those things because of the bond and the compassion and the wisdom of and the what’s beautiful strengthen Community like that. And so I told one of one of the kids have been following me around the moment. I started the hypnotism show definitely dance to A Different Drummer.
He was already bearded looked like it was 20 years old. He was always wearing a hoodie was nine. I’m sober now. He was very different from the other kids that dealt successfully with some anger management, but truly ADHD. I mean right to the point where I had to gently go. Okay. I really do love it.
And I don’t have a whole lot left onto ours sleeps too. Don’t take it personally, but I’m going to draw some boundaries here and I really enjoyed the questions you’re asking. So when I told him that is that, you know, my reaction was very strong and I want to thank you guys and you in particular.
Being dialoguing with me and I got a lot out of it and it will you know when I told me she shouldn’t beat yourself, you know over that. I say, you know that you’re right. That’s I agree with you. And what I want to tell you is I wasn’t being myself. I was feeling the feeling I had suppressed for a long time and along with that came the words that were that didn’t match it a hundred percent, but they were.
It would have been spoken or could be spoken now, right? Those feelings are facts. They’re not the truth. They’re just a part of a much larger truth to get to that larger truth and to get to that compassion to keep my love light on in my heart. If you want to quote the Grateful Dead one policeman who calls him up before.
I need to travel through those feelings if I suppress them. If I said well, yeah, these feelings aren’t karmically good for me or there about the past two and that’s bullshit. Hmm. I’ve got them. I need to be able to make friends with them to discharge them harmlessly and to learn from them then compassion just flows effortlessly, right?
I’m reminded of going through the ants and Ford Theater and hearing Ramdas speak. Gobble sustained. Well, whatever. I want to say. Dr. Kevorkian. That’s not it. It was a psychiatrist who did all the LSD experiments with Cary Grant in the Hollywood folks and there were celebrating him. I am interviewing him on my radio show on.
So the guys who were really involved in the Harvard LSD moments Brom Daus Paul Alpert at the time. Hmm, Ralph Metzker really quite brilliant spiritual mind Paul the most real Krasner and the course Timothy Leary Timothy Leary all of them were there at that bites. Drink, I rewarded what a show right that would have been I had VIP stuff because we had done radio promo for them my wife and a holistic dentist and his wife from Malibu the moment we walked in it was like everyone was having flashbacks just from the amount of Patchouli oil.
Yeah. Oh my God, everybody’s back to the Missoula parties and everything else and you know, we went and Timmy was actually coherent because I’d heard him speak a number times evenly. I need to be on like six tabs of acid to understand what he’s saying it right and even then was it worth it? No, but here I guess he was behaving himself because the other gods were his equals right?
He wasn’t a big ego show for him. Although I’ve been told that at that point in his life. He was way more coherent than normal. I mean that I had seen him before and then it came around us is Thomas began. Everybody was just extraordinary the night and he looks out of the crowd if you don’t I recognize a lot of.
Your faces and you some of you have been following my trip or you know since back in the days when I went to that these guys at Harvard, right and you’ve seen the guru phase and the interface and the working with prisoners and dinner etc. Etc in the breathing in the be here now and I think I have every right to ask me well.
Did any of a change to any of it alter your you know way of being in this world than any of it changed the neuroses you started with? I said and I have to answer you honestly as honestly and directly zakat the answer is no. I have every one of them that I started. But I do need to explain that to you.
I understand. This is my translation and I’m the other sizing it of course else to this day. It just brings so powerfully because he had me at you have every right to ask me no changing. The thing is gone like that. He said when Paul and Ralph and Timothy and I were together then my experience of the world was my neuroses were.
25/8 they were six feet taller than me and wider than me and darker than me. They were around all the time every minute of the day and every minute I could conceive of and every minute I can remember it and by taking this path and by bringing mindfulness and breath and compassion and service and all this and taking my life seriously.
It’s like this now. I’m sitting at a table talking to you or to someone else and no sitting at the table drinking tea. And a little schmoo approaches me and I look out and go. Oh, anxiety my old friend come in. It’s been two weeks. What do you think? What have you come to teach me today? What can I learn right and I’ll be sitting for a while longer and I’ll talk to anxiety and help show up another day and it’s like.
Oh my God, is that really you’re kidding your back, dude? Two years you haven’t as much as picked up the phone or send a postcard sexual perversion. Oh boy. It’s been so long. Come on in and let’s talk. What have you come to tell me? What can I learn today? That’s my relationship to the roses.
Do I have every single one of them that I started with? Yes, have they shrunk? The relationship to my life and my energy to where they are. Literally the size of Smooths it occasionally visits and I now have known not only to befriend them but to learn from them. Yes, and so did my path has value to me.
Absolutely. I was really heartened by that my God if that guy put in that much work and the goal was not violating these things but to use them as one of his books said Grist for the mill. Hmm But made a shitload more sense to me than my kind of black and white. Sort of juvenile idea of only I meditate right and get this right.
I’ll just you know be transformed in the twinkling of an eye as we all learn to let you go in. Yeah, you go into it thinking that this is what I’m going to do. I’m going to become completely calm and be all, you know, Zen and you not so much not so, you know, you just you have to live with your life and you have to live with you-you are.
I still think and I think there is not so much a counterbalance but still taking account in a practical realistic way outside of the meditative space. It’s okay because okay in Jewish. There’s a what the hell is the word? I’m looking for not a Prohibition but a looking suggestion not to do. You’re not supposed to study Kabbalah the mystical shit until you’re 40, you’re earning a living and can support yourself and your family and you’re married.
Okay, because you got to do that stuff first to be really grounded because if you’re doing this other stuff you could be flying into fantasy and Realms of their fine, but they’re not grounded. Right? Well, I told that to Zaman once and he says, yeah, but understand that sit like a principle because the major Caballes would have been dead.
Isaac Warrior who’s the greatest Cobalt data 36 so he wouldn’t have made the 40 cutoff line. If we wouldn’t even have this stuff, you know, that’s that’s a metaphor. It’s not an actual cutoff line. It’s about you that you’ve achieved the maturity of a forty-year-old and then there’s a sense of whatever because otherwise, why are you messing with getting out of your body astral projecting meditating until you’re one with the universe if you can’t pay the rent and you know shovel your own shit.
Very rice ball sure, you know I’m saying this to myself as well as anybody who’s list ya know and I’ve heard that I’ve heard that actually that’s brought up in even the Dali Lama brought it up in one of his books is that you before you can achieve happiness you have to achieve being able to support yourself and be able to keep herself alive.
I do very much Bob farted as I practice meditation even haphazardly years ago where I would just do it when I felt like, It did allow me to then have a Clarity of mind and looking at you know, what the Practical challenges were what the day-to-day stuff was. My mind was more open. It was more Supple.
It was more. I wouldn’t say have it more creative because I’m wildly that way that’s not a problem for me. I think more focused creativity more quickly willing to run through all the wild possibilities and then go. Okay, and what really feels stronger as his. Actually having some practical possibility right here and right now what well, there’s going into my book for you know later.
That’s right and these tools, you know, I have to give props to inside timer it really in a way that nothing else could have. Got me completely got me addicted to meditating Yeah, just something about seeing that 200 days of trusting me. I’ve had my ambivalence about my trial path religious stuff all that stuff a lot of it my background in this is strictly not the nomination on not I didn’t talk about it today because.
Are you think it would be as interesting as the knowledge I have about the Jewish past. Well, I think that was that was what I was really interested in that but you know with this I just want to I want to bring a conclusion to our interview. Okay, and and I just again I really appreciate you come and you allow me to do this-this was this was great and I look forward to you know, the next set of questions that I have.
Well, I would love to actually have a dialogue. Where I wasn’t completely. Yeah, boys and girls by all mean Airlines. I would love to bring a couple of questions to you and actually do that kind of thing. Yeah. Yeah. I think that’d be that’d be fun sharing and maybe I’ll mix the next version of this will go into that bowl to of iPod in a bag.
Yeah. That’s right. That’s right. Anyway, thank you so very much. We’ll see you next time. All right.